Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Fatty McFatterton

Well today I had another one of those days where something really got to me, and I just had to let you all know.  I have a Communications class Tuesdays and Thursdays and it is a lot of fun, but something gets on my nerves while I sit in this class, and it amplifies when I leave it.  The thing that annoys me is the fat stupid people in my class.  
My teacher is obese, just like over one third of the United States, she also exhibits signs of being, well an idiot.  Being fat doesn't make somebody a bad person, or necessarily an idiot but, throughout my life I have seen a strong connection between being fat and being stupid... which is pretty much why I lost hope for this great country formerly known as the land of freedom and opportunity.  What is the United States now?  It is a country full of fat idiots.  I can see most people disagreeing with me and that's fine... you are entitled to your own opinion, but you are most likely one of the fat idiots I'm talking about.
There are a whole lot of facts out there to support my theory, so let me just give you guys the highlights.  37% of the United States is considered obese, making the US the fattest country in the entire world!!!! Congratulations Fatty's!!!!  On top of that, we consistently score lower on standardized tests than most other countries that are considered first world, although we have the largest and most respected University system in the world.  Hmmm how does that work? Here, go to this link so you can get an idea of the level of stupidity I run into on a daily basis... 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYmTEmUYj_8&feature=related

Do you see? Is that not sad?  Have we really gotten this dumb?  Sadly we have... and we can blame it all on ourselves.  
So lets present my theory shall we?  I believe that two of the main reasons that people get fat are being lazy and having no self respect... which I also believe are the two main reasons people get stupid, so it would only make sense for there to be a lot of fat and stupid people... Right?
If you are lazy you don't exercise nearly enough, which is why you can get fat.  If you have no self respect than you don't care enough about your body,(mind you the only body you will get in your life), to work out, making sure it lasts as long as it can, so you get fatter than you were when you were just lazy.  This combination of lack of self respect and laziness will give you the body more at home with the whales than with your peers.  
If you are lazy, learning is a chore.  I understand school can be a drag, but school isn't what makes you smart... you are what makes you smart.  You can read and learn about things that interest you without going to school.  That can expand your mind and make you smarter.  I have met people that dropped out of High School that are more intelligent than people with Phd's.  Having no self respect makes you stupid too.  If you have any self respect you will make sure you are smart so that you can compete in this harsh reality we live in.  If you don't have self respect you probably will join a gang, watch Mtv/Vh1 and believe anything that someone you admire tells you... that means sadly in this country the people that you admire could be the likes of New York, Flava Flave and Brett Michael's with all of the skank's he has on his shows.... ewwww I think I might puke!!!
Simple... we now know how and why people are fat and stupid, but what is the point of diagnosing this problem without being able to solve it?  This is where the biggest problem is, as well as the source of all of my frustration.  No body can solve this problem except for the people themselves on an individual level.  I can sit here and write out all of the things that someone can do to stop being lazy and learn self respect, but most likely the people that need to follow my suggestions the most are just going to sit on there couch watching I love New York and Rock of Love eating KFC and forgetting what it feels like to see their own toes... its a conundrum.  So... here we are... now if you read this ask yourself these simple questions....

1) When you get a flat tire do you...
a) change it to the spare yourself b) call AAA c) call someone you know to help you out

2) Can you name all of the Continents on earth?

3) Can you point out the United Kingdom on an unmarked map?

4) Do you think Sarah Palin was a good running mate for John McCain?

Your answers if you are not fat and stupid should go as follows....
a)
Yes 
Yes
NO

Here is why

1)  You don't need to be strong at all to change a tire... the directions and tools to do the job are in your freaking car.... so uh learn to read and stop being a fat lazy idiot

2) There are only seven fucking continents if you cant remember seven names you should not have been born

3) Come on... the United Kingdom is the big island off of the western coast of Europe, plus the northern tip of Ireland, which happens to be the smaller island west of the big island.... grow a brain

4) She obviously wasn't qualified, she gave horrible speeches, sucked at interviews ooooh and did I mention that she's an idiot and sounds more like a Canadian than an Alaskan? Eh? how abooot dat.


So wake up people!!!!  Life is such a beautiful thing to waste... stay in shape... explore the world... expand your mind... learn new things... meet new people... our society needs to change... and it won't change until we ALL make the conscious decision to change it for the better.  I will be here to help... if I see that you are fat, act stupid and exhibit all of the bad qualities I have explained above, expect a fat slap right across the dignity that you thought you had.....

ImAllGood

Erik

Monday, February 2, 2009

1st Post

Hello all that may read the wonderful thoughts that flow from my complex mind into this force we call cyberspace, my name is Erik and I have started this blog to allow the things that consume my mind to intrigue yours.  I am new to this, so bear with me until I get a handle on things.  This being my first post and all I have decided to examine something that effects everybody on this earth in profound ways... relationships.  Yes, I know I am probably the millionth blogger to cover this issue but hey, I could have a new perspective on things.   Everybody has a first love, some people may be lucky enough to marry their first love, but most of us are not that fortunate, so if you fit into that category listen up...  Lately I have been hearing from many of my friends about their first loves.  Some haven't talked to their first love in years, and some just got out of a relationship with them, but they both have one thing in common, the burden of the pain a first love leaves behind. 
My first love left behind this pain, and for a while I thought I was the only one who carried the burden around, but I have gotten over my naivete and accepted the fact that most of us do carry around a similar pain.  The big question in this matter is if the pain goes away, or if we as humans do what we do best and adapt by hiding the pain away.  The funny thing about this conundrum to me is that if you hide something away well enough is that the same as it going away?  I remember about a year ago I decided I was going to get rid of all the memories of my first love.  All of the cards she got me... all of the pictures of her.... all of the things tangible I had around that reminded me of her I got rid of, and I put her out of my life.... I no longer went anywhere near her house, I no longer went to the local mall where she worked, I made sure there was zero chance that I would ever see her so that my pain would eventually subside.  
The funny thing is about three months into my first love memory boycott, I actually quit thinking about her.  I accepted the fact that I left her for a good reason and I would go for days without even a glimpse of her in my mind.  I felt great, and now that I look back at it, I know I went months without thinking of her at all, and I hadn't been that happy in a long time.
Time went by happily, and I had new things going on in my life.  I was halfway through my study abroad semester in London when I met a girl that would change how I felt.  I had, well at the time so I thought, gotten past my first love, and was cautious not to let someone get too close to me.  One of the mindsets I had put myself in to get over my first love was to not really trust girls too much.  I had been with my share of women that had significant others since I left my first love 3 years before, and it had illustrated to me how heartless people can be just to satisfy temporary needs and feelings.  This girl seemed different though, not the type I usually went for and for some reason I started to have feelings for her, feelings I hadn't felt since I met my first love.  We were mutually exclusive for about a month and a half in London, and it was wonderful, we talked and laughed, and planned on seeing how things would work when we got back to the states.  She lived about an hour and a half from me, so we didn't rush into a boyfriend girlfriend set up.  She came and visited me first, the date was fun for the both of us, we saw a terrible movie in IMAX, we broke my Olive Garden Virginity, and we went back to my place to play Mario Cart 64 and make out just like people in a happy mutually exclusive relationship do.  Our next date was about a week later, this time I drove an hour and a half to see her.  I had no clue what we would do, but I like spur of the moment stuff, so I didn't really care, as long as I got to see her.  To my surprise I didn't get to go on a date with her, so much as her whole family, mom, dad, little brother, older sister and her boyfriend for good measure.  All in all it was a good day, we went to the ocean like one big happy family and had a great lunch, then we went back to her house and baked and painted Christmas cookies and played Pictionary.  Even though I would have rather just hung out with her all day and done the oh so fun activities we enjoyed in London, I was excited to have met her whole family like that, I thought it illustrated how serious she was about our relationship maybe going to the next level.  
I was wrong, very wrong actually.  A few days later our plans fell through for a date, and the day after that she posted on facebook that she had gotten back with the ex she had left before her semester in London.  I wasn't exactly surprised, I figured things might not work out because of the distance between us, but she never talked about her ex with me, so him being the reason my feelings were brushed aside didn't sit well.  
The worst part about it though was the fact that I think about her every day now, I think about the chemistry we had and the inside jokes we had, every little flaw she had that I liked... its torture.  I saw things in her that I don't see in the other girls I have dated since, and I haven't been excited about the girls I'm dating now like I was bout her.  Which brings me to the thing that bothers me the most.... missing things about her has made me think about my first love, who took so long for me to hide away and burry.  Now not only do I think about my most recent romance, but I also think about my first one, and I wonder... will the burden get heavier and heavier the more romances I have?  I guess only time will tell, but I have pulled a lesson out of all this luckily.  I have learned not to regret anything, even though people can hurt you in relationships it isn't worth it to dwell on the bad feelings losing the relationship carries.  
Life is a beautiful thing, and the good parts about it, the new loves, the goals achieved, the barriers breached, well they wouldn't be nearly as beautiful if you as an individual haven't experienced the pain of the loves lost, the goals failed and the barriers that hold strong.

ImAllGood You should be too....

Erik